Excuse Me

I rarely post on here anymore and I truly do consider that unfortunate. I could once again use the excuse that I'm just too busy, but it's a tired excuse that should be allowed to rest without the likes of me calling upon it to stand up for me every time I lose dedication or focus. It's an easy excuse because it's one we can all relate to. "Yeah, well I mean, he's busy. I can understand that, I'm busy too it must be hard to find the time..." The real trouble with an excuse is that it doesn't ever really go away. We kind of tuck it away in the back of our life toolbox and let it sit there, because you never know when you're going to need a good excuse; especially one that's worked in the past. And excuses are addictive. There's no doubt about it. I mean, a good excuse is a little like magic. You find yourself in trouble and you rummage through your past to find a good excuse, or perhaps spend time building a brand new one, and you pull it out and use it...and the problem disappears in a smoke of understanding.

Hi, my name is Josh Taylor, and I'm an excuse addict.

I'm trying to repent of my excusing-ways and move on, to get to a place where honesty and accountability are the expectation rather than the exception. I have no misconceptions about getting help from friends and family, this is something I'll need to do on my own. Because the truth of it is folks, each and every one of us is surrounded by excuse addicts. They're showing up late to restaurants in the form of our friends; they're writing excuses for the masses in health journals; hell, some of the biggest addicts I've ever seen are running the very country I live in. We live in an excuse addicted society that will accept our twisting of the truth (or outright lie if it's well designed) just so long as we promise to do the same when the roles are reversed. It's like a game we allow ourselves to play, as though nothing more than some antiquated notion of truth is at stake.

Perhaps it isn't, who can say? But for a minute I'd like to take the idealistic stance that truth is not an antiquated notion. That perhaps the way we have been syphoning away the moral reserves of our responsibility and accountability is less a one way street than it is a wrong turn. That maybe, just maybe, we can move closer from where we are now to where we all know we should be. A daunting task to be sure. An uphill struggle, undoubtedly. But a worthy cause? As worthy as they come. But I think we can all help each other. I'm taking the first step, putting myself out there. Welcome to Excusers Anonymous. Next time you come, bring a friend, or two, or three. I know there's no shortage of qualifying candidates.

The rules we will follow are very simple. First and foremost, we must take every effort to stop making excuses for ourselves. Own up to your mistakes. Looks so nice and easy written on a computer screen doesn't it? Almost trivial. "Of course I was raised to do that, it's simple. I mean, the only time I don't really is when other people are doing it too and if they're going to I might as well too." We're all guilty of trying to create an umbrella for ourselves so the shitstorm might slide off to one side or the other, rather than landing directly on our own heads. So what if it splashes someone else's shoes, they're the ones who chose to stand there. Because that's the real truth: an excuse almost always serves to not only get the blame off of ourselves, but actually point it as someone else. Re-assigning blame is the ugly stepsister of the excuse. Just look at politicians, they're literally professionals in this regard.

The second rule is that we cannot allow others to go on making excuses either. That means two different things. First, we can't make excuses for others. That's not much better than making them for ourselves. Secondly, we need to call them out on their bullshit when we hear it and recognize it. And let's be honest, excuses are rarely so well camouflaged that we mistake them for the truth. If we break that pact, then they aren't going to accept our excuses either and we've created a cycle where excuses are no longer acceptable.

So the next time you're late for work, or a dinner, or a meeting, don't blame traffic when you know damned well you left 15 minutes late. Don't say you can't quit smoking because all of your friends do it and it's impossible to quit when you're surrounded by it. Don't blame work for not spending enough time with your family when you find time to manage a fantasy baseball team or catch your team's game 3 nights a week. And don't tell us you misunderstood the question when you're running for public office and accidentally answered from your heart rather than using the scripted responses expected by your party. I'm so sick of one dimensional politicians who put more stock in keeping their political party happy than following their own beliefs I can't stand it. Most importantly, if you piss someone off because you listened to the advice I've written here, don't blame me. If you do, I'm just gonna blame Blogger for giving me the opportunity to write here anyway.