This week some encouragement to get your ass out there and do something spontaneous:
The things we have our hearts set on are the things that end up most disappointing. It is the unexpected things that seemingly come from nowhere that are the greatest of our lives. -JT
Live it up.
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Monday, September 24, 2007
Fall Up
For those of you who don't realize it, fall is officially here. Yesterday (Sunday) marked the official end of summer and the beginning of fall. For those taking notes at home, the proper term for this is the autumnal equinox. This day always falls between September 20th and 23rd and it marks a time when the day is equally divided into lightness and darkness. There's some fun trivia for you to throw around at a party, don't thank me. Anyway, I was disheartened to learn that summer was officially over because I absolutely love summer. I know a lot of people do, but it's damn close to a religious experience for me, I mean I really love it. After the initial shock I began to think about fall and why I dread it so much, because I do. It occurred to me that the only reason I dislike fall is that it's the opening act for winter. As one might deduce, being a summer lover means I'm also a winter hater.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized that I actually like fall a lot, as long as I don't think about it as the winter harbinger. Being a young guy, fall still makes me think of back to school. I have to admit that, even though I didn't really enjoy school, there was always a sliver of excitement in the misery pie that meant classes were starting again. New clothes, new year, new possibilities. The formative years spent in school are chaotic and confusing, and it always seemed like returning from summer vacation each year brought an entirely new student body into the classrooms. You change quick at a young age and sometimes a few months was all it would take for an ugly duckling to mature into a really hot chick. Of course after a few weeks you realize that people rarely change, not dramatically at least. That's when the death of excitement is official and the tyranny of normality takes over. I think that's what fall is, in a small way. If spring is the season of rebirth then fall is surely the season of death. Some might argue that winter is truly the season of death but it's really just the funeral. During the fall plants wither and die, the days grow shorter and darker and all the plans you had for the summer are slowly abandoned, left to rot in the dark recesses of garages across America. And life seems to slow down. Even though life is kind of crazy with kids going back to school and holidays on the horizon, to me the heartbeat of the world has always appeared to decelerate during autumn. Weather cools down and you pack away the shorts and t-shirts in favor of jackets and sweaters you haven't seen in 5 months. Less and less time is spent outside and before you know it you have to start your car before you leave in the morning, just to warm it up for the trip.
What I really like about fall is the vision in my mind of the season, the way it fills my head with a pleasant nostalgia. I've already mentioned going back to school but it also makes me think of watching high school sports in the bleachers with a group of friends and a blanket. Of going apple picking with my family and drinking warm cider with fresh apple donuts. I think of chopping wood outside with my father, doing my best to keep up as my cheeks burn a rosy red. I don't know why, but I've always thought of fall as pie season. I love pie and in the fall there are always more varieties to choose from than any other time of the year, provided my mom feels like baking. If she doesn't that's fine because fall is also football season and that means junk food with the guys in front of a television doing nothing but enjoying the most popular sport in America. I also think of fairs and festivals and eating maple cotton candy. I remember mountain biking through the mud and returning home exhausted to cups of hot chocolate. Fall is when I start renting movies instead of going to theaters to see them, hopefully cuddled under a blanket next to an attractive girl. And to me, the culmination of fall is Thanksgiving. The parade, the meal, the family. It's the last bit of that lazy, calm, friendly season I see in my head, before people go Christmas crazy and serious snow starts to fall. I know this has been a bit touchy-feely, maybe even a bit trite, but that's what fall does to me. I can't help myself, my picture of fall was painted by Norman Rockwell using hackneyed Americana as a canvas. For some reason I see in fall a vivid representation of what's right with our country. Not when I look out my window or wake up in the morning, but in my vision of what fall represents for me. It sounds crazy for a season to evoke such feelings but it is what it is. I hope your fall lives up to the one in my head. Happy autumn.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized that I actually like fall a lot, as long as I don't think about it as the winter harbinger. Being a young guy, fall still makes me think of back to school. I have to admit that, even though I didn't really enjoy school, there was always a sliver of excitement in the misery pie that meant classes were starting again. New clothes, new year, new possibilities. The formative years spent in school are chaotic and confusing, and it always seemed like returning from summer vacation each year brought an entirely new student body into the classrooms. You change quick at a young age and sometimes a few months was all it would take for an ugly duckling to mature into a really hot chick. Of course after a few weeks you realize that people rarely change, not dramatically at least. That's when the death of excitement is official and the tyranny of normality takes over. I think that's what fall is, in a small way. If spring is the season of rebirth then fall is surely the season of death. Some might argue that winter is truly the season of death but it's really just the funeral. During the fall plants wither and die, the days grow shorter and darker and all the plans you had for the summer are slowly abandoned, left to rot in the dark recesses of garages across America. And life seems to slow down. Even though life is kind of crazy with kids going back to school and holidays on the horizon, to me the heartbeat of the world has always appeared to decelerate during autumn. Weather cools down and you pack away the shorts and t-shirts in favor of jackets and sweaters you haven't seen in 5 months. Less and less time is spent outside and before you know it you have to start your car before you leave in the morning, just to warm it up for the trip.
What I really like about fall is the vision in my mind of the season, the way it fills my head with a pleasant nostalgia. I've already mentioned going back to school but it also makes me think of watching high school sports in the bleachers with a group of friends and a blanket. Of going apple picking with my family and drinking warm cider with fresh apple donuts. I think of chopping wood outside with my father, doing my best to keep up as my cheeks burn a rosy red. I don't know why, but I've always thought of fall as pie season. I love pie and in the fall there are always more varieties to choose from than any other time of the year, provided my mom feels like baking. If she doesn't that's fine because fall is also football season and that means junk food with the guys in front of a television doing nothing but enjoying the most popular sport in America. I also think of fairs and festivals and eating maple cotton candy. I remember mountain biking through the mud and returning home exhausted to cups of hot chocolate. Fall is when I start renting movies instead of going to theaters to see them, hopefully cuddled under a blanket next to an attractive girl. And to me, the culmination of fall is Thanksgiving. The parade, the meal, the family. It's the last bit of that lazy, calm, friendly season I see in my head, before people go Christmas crazy and serious snow starts to fall. I know this has been a bit touchy-feely, maybe even a bit trite, but that's what fall does to me. I can't help myself, my picture of fall was painted by Norman Rockwell using hackneyed Americana as a canvas. For some reason I see in fall a vivid representation of what's right with our country. Not when I look out my window or wake up in the morning, but in my vision of what fall represents for me. It sounds crazy for a season to evoke such feelings but it is what it is. I hope your fall lives up to the one in my head. Happy autumn.
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
WWW #5
Hey guys, here ya go:
Each of us places our own interests above all others. If you asked a teacher how we could ensure the success of your society in the future he would tell you with education. A general would tell you the answer lies in our continued security. A judge would tell you that it will take a strict sense of justice. We all project a little of our self into the issues surrounding us. It makes sense that we want to fix the thing we see most clearly is broken. –JT
Until next week...
Each of us places our own interests above all others. If you asked a teacher how we could ensure the success of your society in the future he would tell you with education. A general would tell you the answer lies in our continued security. A judge would tell you that it will take a strict sense of justice. We all project a little of our self into the issues surrounding us. It makes sense that we want to fix the thing we see most clearly is broken. –JT
Until next week...
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Dragon Bores
This post isn't going to have much of a point beyond me telling you about something I did this past weekend and warning you never to do it yourself. I'll come right out and say it: Do not, under any circumstances, go see the movie Dragon Wars. If you haven't heard of this movie, I'm not surprised, because I hadn't either. As a matter of fact it was just Friday night, during the Red Sox game at a party, that I heard of it myself. I'm just nerdy enough that I get really excited about dragon stuff. Why? Because they're big, flying, fire breathing frickin' dragons, that's why. So when I saw the preview (admittedly after having just a few drinks) my friends and I decided that we needed to see this film. This was not a good idea.
The movie was so bad it's hard to enumerate the actual elements that sucked. But for your benefit I'll try. The script was awful, the acting equally so and to top it all off the supposed "dragons" were actually just bigass snakes. No wings, no fire breathing (until the very end) and lots of not coolness. Sure that's a word. The movie was not only poorly done it wasn't even bad in a funny way. In fact, this is the first movie I have ever fallen asleep during at the theater. After it was over, which seemed to take roughly 5 or 6 hours, I felt dirty. I mean it, I feel like someone took advantage of me and not only that, it cost me money. This is a short post and it's not even enlightening, except to tell you that you really, really don't want to see this movie. Don't go see it in theaters, don't rent it when it comes out on video, neglect it like the ugly girl you accidentally fooled around with in high school. I'm not kidding about this, you should avoid it like the plague. Not only because it sucks harder than a Hoover, but because the people responsible for setting this movie loose on the public should be punished by a complete lack of revenue. I'm offended as a writer trying to get published that this huge piece of shit was made and that money was invested to bring it to fruition. Do not support this movie in any way shape or form. One last time I repeat myself, do not go see Dragon Wars. Even if you get drunk with your friends and decide that it looks ok, it's not. That is all.
The movie was so bad it's hard to enumerate the actual elements that sucked. But for your benefit I'll try. The script was awful, the acting equally so and to top it all off the supposed "dragons" were actually just bigass snakes. No wings, no fire breathing (until the very end) and lots of not coolness. Sure that's a word. The movie was not only poorly done it wasn't even bad in a funny way. In fact, this is the first movie I have ever fallen asleep during at the theater. After it was over, which seemed to take roughly 5 or 6 hours, I felt dirty. I mean it, I feel like someone took advantage of me and not only that, it cost me money. This is a short post and it's not even enlightening, except to tell you that you really, really don't want to see this movie. Don't go see it in theaters, don't rent it when it comes out on video, neglect it like the ugly girl you accidentally fooled around with in high school. I'm not kidding about this, you should avoid it like the plague. Not only because it sucks harder than a Hoover, but because the people responsible for setting this movie loose on the public should be punished by a complete lack of revenue. I'm offended as a writer trying to get published that this huge piece of shit was made and that money was invested to bring it to fruition. Do not support this movie in any way shape or form. One last time I repeat myself, do not go see Dragon Wars. Even if you get drunk with your friends and decide that it looks ok, it's not. That is all.
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
WWW #4
Here it is:
We’re all weird, all human. I mean, what the hell is normal? We aren’t cut into smooth, straight lines; we’re jagged and misshapen, like puzzle pieces. We can never hope to be normal, never hope not to be weird. All we can do is look for other people whose imperfections and oddities perfectly match our own, just like pieces in a puzzle. –JT
Have a good week.
We’re all weird, all human. I mean, what the hell is normal? We aren’t cut into smooth, straight lines; we’re jagged and misshapen, like puzzle pieces. We can never hope to be normal, never hope not to be weird. All we can do is look for other people whose imperfections and oddities perfectly match our own, just like pieces in a puzzle. –JT
Have a good week.
Monday, September 10, 2007
Crazy or Crazy Fun?
A couple of years ago a buddy of mine introduced me to an activity referred to as cliff jumping. It's as self explanatory as titles can get, but for those wondering it does indeed involve jumping off of cliffs. It started out with small cliffs, about 15-20 feet above the water. All things considered that isn't really that high, but the first time it's pretty scary; therein lies the appeal. More of my friends began doing it and before long were were going cliff jumping on almost a weekly basis. Just like any other addiction, adrenaline rushes require bigger, badder doses as you become accustomed to them. Therefore, as always happens, what started as15 feet climbed higher and higher, until we were jumping off of cliffs around 50 feet high with little hesitation. At one of our favorite spots is the "76 Footer" which causes multiple injuries every summer, some quite serious. I haven't attempted this jump yet, but I'm thinking about it. Bigger, higher, faster, longer. Such is the nature of cliff jumping.
I love cliff jumping for a few different reasons, but mainly because it allows me to be outside and swim, while at the same time scaring the shit out of me just a little bit. If it happens to be the first time I'm jumping a new cliff it actually scares the shit out of me a lot. But that's what I love about it. To some people 50 feet might not sound all that high. To some (like my family) it sounds like suicide. This dichotomy is essentially the point I'm headed towards. When you're standing on a rocky outcrop 50 feet above the water a lot goes through your mind. Most of these things revolve around the injuries you could potentially sustain if you were to, I don't know, land on your head somehow. As a guy you're also thinking about the other guys already in the water below taunting you if you back out. The one thing that enters everybody's head is a single question: Why did I step up to this ledge in the first place?
Everyone will have a different answer to that question. Maybe some of them were pressured there by friends, or tricked into a path where jumping was the only way down. But I think most people are there because they want to know something about themselves. Fear isn't something you need to stand on top of a cliff to find, it's all around us. Perhaps you're afraid of crashing every time you get on a plane, or of failing when your boss trusts you with a major project. It could be as simple as being afraid of approaching a girl at a bar or standing up to a jerk. We all have fears which we repeatedly concede to for one reason or another. I believe the reason most people willingly walk to the edge of a tall cliff to jump is that they want to know if they can stare into the abyss and give fear the finger. Of course you don't have to jump off a cliff to find out, but it certainly simplifies the equation. It's just you, the cliff and the water below you; the fear is tangible and identifiable. The cliff cannot be reasoned with to avoid confrontation, it cannot be intimidated or dissuaded. It isn't going to disappear if you procrastinate and it will never find pity on you. The act of cliff jumping is almost perfect for the confrontation of fear because almost no effort whatsoever is required of you. All you really have to do is take a single step and gravity will perform her duty perfectly for you. If you are standing on that cliff you certainly possess the ability to take the step and fall towards the water, but something holds you back. THAT is fear. When you look down at the water below and contemplate the jump you can damn near see fear's face, feel fear's hand against your chest, hear fear's voice whisper in your ear. In day to day life fear is obscured by many things, but on the cliff it's just the two of you, both equally exposed.
Those of us who jump understand that, we appreciate the ability to put ourselves in a situation where we can tackle fear head-on. If you give in to fear at that moment there are no excuses or justifications; fear won a victory over you. But if you can swallow hard and take that one step you can tell fear to go to hell the whole way down. Those who think we're crazy for doing this might say our victory was inconsequential, that nothing was actually gained by the dangerous jump. I wholeheartedly disagree. I would invite those people to try it, to experience the freedom and exhilaration that accompany a jump. Furthermore I contend that small, personal victories over fear lay the foundation for larger, more vital victories in the future. Ostensibly the jump may not have accomplished much, but perhaps it will teach you how to tap into your courage when necessary. Overcoming fear empowers you to do other things and it's a lesson not quickly forgotten. So this week get your ass out there and purposely terrify yourself. Just do something that scares you. Jump off a cliff, go mountain biking, go white water rafting, try a scary ride at an amusement park. Confront your mortality and put fear in its place. You might just learn to like it. After someone jumps off a cliff for the first time and their head comes up from underwater they either laugh or scream a war-cry of elation. And they smile. Every damn time, it's a certainty. That smile is fear losing its grip on them.
I love cliff jumping for a few different reasons, but mainly because it allows me to be outside and swim, while at the same time scaring the shit out of me just a little bit. If it happens to be the first time I'm jumping a new cliff it actually scares the shit out of me a lot. But that's what I love about it. To some people 50 feet might not sound all that high. To some (like my family) it sounds like suicide. This dichotomy is essentially the point I'm headed towards. When you're standing on a rocky outcrop 50 feet above the water a lot goes through your mind. Most of these things revolve around the injuries you could potentially sustain if you were to, I don't know, land on your head somehow. As a guy you're also thinking about the other guys already in the water below taunting you if you back out. The one thing that enters everybody's head is a single question: Why did I step up to this ledge in the first place?
Everyone will have a different answer to that question. Maybe some of them were pressured there by friends, or tricked into a path where jumping was the only way down. But I think most people are there because they want to know something about themselves. Fear isn't something you need to stand on top of a cliff to find, it's all around us. Perhaps you're afraid of crashing every time you get on a plane, or of failing when your boss trusts you with a major project. It could be as simple as being afraid of approaching a girl at a bar or standing up to a jerk. We all have fears which we repeatedly concede to for one reason or another. I believe the reason most people willingly walk to the edge of a tall cliff to jump is that they want to know if they can stare into the abyss and give fear the finger. Of course you don't have to jump off a cliff to find out, but it certainly simplifies the equation. It's just you, the cliff and the water below you; the fear is tangible and identifiable. The cliff cannot be reasoned with to avoid confrontation, it cannot be intimidated or dissuaded. It isn't going to disappear if you procrastinate and it will never find pity on you. The act of cliff jumping is almost perfect for the confrontation of fear because almost no effort whatsoever is required of you. All you really have to do is take a single step and gravity will perform her duty perfectly for you. If you are standing on that cliff you certainly possess the ability to take the step and fall towards the water, but something holds you back. THAT is fear. When you look down at the water below and contemplate the jump you can damn near see fear's face, feel fear's hand against your chest, hear fear's voice whisper in your ear. In day to day life fear is obscured by many things, but on the cliff it's just the two of you, both equally exposed.
Those of us who jump understand that, we appreciate the ability to put ourselves in a situation where we can tackle fear head-on. If you give in to fear at that moment there are no excuses or justifications; fear won a victory over you. But if you can swallow hard and take that one step you can tell fear to go to hell the whole way down. Those who think we're crazy for doing this might say our victory was inconsequential, that nothing was actually gained by the dangerous jump. I wholeheartedly disagree. I would invite those people to try it, to experience the freedom and exhilaration that accompany a jump. Furthermore I contend that small, personal victories over fear lay the foundation for larger, more vital victories in the future. Ostensibly the jump may not have accomplished much, but perhaps it will teach you how to tap into your courage when necessary. Overcoming fear empowers you to do other things and it's a lesson not quickly forgotten. So this week get your ass out there and purposely terrify yourself. Just do something that scares you. Jump off a cliff, go mountain biking, go white water rafting, try a scary ride at an amusement park. Confront your mortality and put fear in its place. You might just learn to like it. After someone jumps off a cliff for the first time and their head comes up from underwater they either laugh or scream a war-cry of elation. And they smile. Every damn time, it's a certainty. That smile is fear losing its grip on them.
"Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage."
-Anais Nin
Thursday, September 6, 2007
WWW #3...Sort of
I realize that it's actually Thursday and my WWW is a day late, but I've been very busy this week and didn't have the time yesterday. Fortunately for me, hardly anybody is reading this thing yet so only about 4 people are even going to notice I missed it. On the other hand, maybe that isn't so fortunate...oh well. Here it is:
In regards to the opposite sex: hot is a display of confidence, cute is a lack thereof. -JT
Have a great weekend everyone.
In regards to the opposite sex: hot is a display of confidence, cute is a lack thereof. -JT
Have a great weekend everyone.
Tuesday, September 4, 2007
My Expensive Morning
This past weekend, as with most weekends, I crashed at a house shared by 4 of my buddies. We party and hang out and have a good time. When there I've been parking in roughly the same spot for the past 4 or 5 months. So I was more than a little surprised to find my car, and many of my friends cars, ticketed on Sunday morning. Surprised, pissed, whatever you want to call it. Anyway, my buddy said a cop was out ticketing so I went to take a look and sure enough I was too late; there on my windshield was a little orange envelope. This wasn't the first time I'd been ticketed for parking in the "wrong" area of the little city, so I knew what to expect. In the past I've received tickets ranging from $10-15. It's annoying, but ultimately quite minor. So I knew what I was in for, that is, right up until I actually removed the envelope from under my wiper.
The $10 ticket I had received for parking on a Residents Only street turned out to be $45.
After months of parking there, one of the neighbors had actually called the police because so many non-residents had parked on their street. Contrary to what you may be thinking, I didn't make this discovery at noon or 1 o' clock. I pulled the ticket from my car at around 9am. In defense of the jerkoff who called the cops, I was technically parked illegally, as were the others who received tickets. However, it was still early and even with all of our cars parked where they were there was plenty of parking left on the street. If they'd waited about an hour or so, all but two of us would have been gone. I know that Sunday is the day of rest, but if you have nothing better to do than wake up to call the police about a few college kid's cars on your street where they shouldn't be, put yourself out of everyone else's misery. That's a dick move, because it just doesn't matter. Did they need the empty spaces to accommodate the people who weren't coming over to visit them?
This kind of thing always bothers me, because it costs me money for nothing. For those who have never visited Burlington, Vermont, there is enough parking for approximately 1/3rd of the population. So, yeah, people park in Resident Only parking. Why? Because they have to park somewhere without walking a mile to get to their destination. Call me crazy, but I think we should all have that right. $45 is quite a bit if you're broke. How much did the city make off of our inconvenience? Well I believe 8 of us were ticketed, so that's $360. Not bad for about 10 minutes of work for a single officer, especially considering the "crime" didn't actually affect anyone negatively.
I'm pissed for reasons previously stated, and I was hoping some people might be able to share some sympathy. It's a ridiculously stupid way to spend $45 when I need a pair of pants or a tank of gas or maybe even some food. God forbid I spend my money on something I need when I have the audacity to park innocently in front of someone's home while both of their cars are in their driveway. Aside from a bit of therapeutic venting, I suppose this post doesn't have much in the way of a point. But if, per chance, you see someone doing something which bothers you for any reason...take a moment to decide whether it's really doing you any harm. Hell, maybe even try to put yourself in their place to understand the motivations for their annoying behavior. If you're an angry, middle-aged man who lives off of East Ave in Burlington, maybe that just means remembering what it's like to be young again, having fun with your friends.
The $10 ticket I had received for parking on a Residents Only street turned out to be $45.
After months of parking there, one of the neighbors had actually called the police because so many non-residents had parked on their street. Contrary to what you may be thinking, I didn't make this discovery at noon or 1 o' clock. I pulled the ticket from my car at around 9am. In defense of the jerkoff who called the cops, I was technically parked illegally, as were the others who received tickets. However, it was still early and even with all of our cars parked where they were there was plenty of parking left on the street. If they'd waited about an hour or so, all but two of us would have been gone. I know that Sunday is the day of rest, but if you have nothing better to do than wake up to call the police about a few college kid's cars on your street where they shouldn't be, put yourself out of everyone else's misery. That's a dick move, because it just doesn't matter. Did they need the empty spaces to accommodate the people who weren't coming over to visit them?
This kind of thing always bothers me, because it costs me money for nothing. For those who have never visited Burlington, Vermont, there is enough parking for approximately 1/3rd of the population. So, yeah, people park in Resident Only parking. Why? Because they have to park somewhere without walking a mile to get to their destination. Call me crazy, but I think we should all have that right. $45 is quite a bit if you're broke. How much did the city make off of our inconvenience? Well I believe 8 of us were ticketed, so that's $360. Not bad for about 10 minutes of work for a single officer, especially considering the "crime" didn't actually affect anyone negatively.
I'm pissed for reasons previously stated, and I was hoping some people might be able to share some sympathy. It's a ridiculously stupid way to spend $45 when I need a pair of pants or a tank of gas or maybe even some food. God forbid I spend my money on something I need when I have the audacity to park innocently in front of someone's home while both of their cars are in their driveway. Aside from a bit of therapeutic venting, I suppose this post doesn't have much in the way of a point. But if, per chance, you see someone doing something which bothers you for any reason...take a moment to decide whether it's really doing you any harm. Hell, maybe even try to put yourself in their place to understand the motivations for their annoying behavior. If you're an angry, middle-aged man who lives off of East Ave in Burlington, maybe that just means remembering what it's like to be young again, having fun with your friends.
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